Added: Rakesha Tee - Date: 18.01.2022 02:26 - Views: 12160 - Clicks: 2011
Chloe, one of our advisory board members, answers your most pressing love and relationship questions every other week on WomensHealthMag. Fairytales and rom-coms have long perpetuated the idea that there's this one single person in the universe who's destined to be your forever partner, your soul mate, but as a relationship therapist, I'm here to tell you that's not the case.
But wait—it's a good thing! I'm taking an even more realistic approach, which I actually find incredibly settling. You see, at their core, a relationship is supposed to help you learn and grow. When you enter into a relationship with a person, you naturally adapt and evolve a little bit based on what they bring out in you—you are, in short, impacted by your partner hopefully for the better.
Isn't that kind of cool? That said, especially in the early stages of dating—when you're hyped up by hormones, lust, and what could be—it can be all too easy to mistake a match for a meant-to-be mate. So to save yourself some confusion, here are 15 s you've found The—or, in my opinion "A"—One.
Okay, this should be an obviousbut in modern dating, it's often not ugh. If you're questioning whether a person you've been hooking up with or dating exclusively or not has till-death-do-us-part potential, it's really important that they are looking for a relationship. Otherwise, you're going to end up putting a lot of pressure on yourself trying to keep them engaged and interested in you, and that should never be the precursor to lasting love.
I have to point this out because so many people love a challenge, which means they might end up chasing someone who isn't as into them. And unrequited crushes and even love happen, and yet you'll still hear people say, "But I know deep down that they're The One. Sure, sometimes emotions build and one person might be more interested in the other in the beginning, but if after a few months of being around this person, they're openly lukewarm about you, they are not your person. Trust is huge in a relationship, and that never changes—in fact, it only becomes more important the longer you stay together, when life will test the strength of your 'ship or marriage.
If you see red flags early that make you question your partner's truthfulness—or you have any reason to doubt their fidelity —it's going to very hard to trust them for the long run. I don't necessarily mean there needs to be total sexual compatibility that can be worked onbut there should be a mutual sexual attraction and a sense of "body comfort. Whatever your body is looking for, you've found it in them. The One might not have everything in common with you, but they'll respect any differences.
Perhaps you're Jewish and they're Catholic, or you're vegan and they're a proud carnivore.
No worries! As long as they don't shame you for your beliefs and values—and rather support you in them the best they can—they have real long-term potential. There's a difference between straight-up ignoring someone's shortcomings because you're otherwise infatuated with them and seeing their flaws and loving them anyway. You never want to ignore things that could be red flags good example: financial recklessness or alcohol issuesbut you do want to be with someone whose weaknesses you find manageable for the long haul their tendency to pack at the last minute.
On that note, if you find yourself not particularly peeved by things that would bother the heck out of you if someone else was doing them like, constantly blowing their nosethat's a good you may have found a lifer. Just know that after the butterfly phase, those rose goggles will be a little less opaque.
Obviously, no one is perfect, not even you. That said, you likely want to be the most perfect version of you when you're around your partner—that's a good ! If you find someone who you feel totally comfortable being a little off on appropriate occasions, that's an even better.
You may have forgotten about some of these engaged celebs who found The One:. You want and really, need someone who can relate to you on the full spectrum of life—that means a person who can be casual, silly, funny, and affectionate, but also strong and insightful when life calls for it. Having a partner who's there for you in one area be it the fun times or the serious stuff but not the other will leave you wanting more.
On the note of someone you can have fun with, your ideal forever person will also help you take yourself less seriously. Humor is a clutch way to be able to step outside yourself and see things with a greater, fresher perspective—and anyone who can help you do that is a keeper. A person who threatens the relationship or shuts you out when a scuffle comes up isn't The One. If you constantly find yourself having to apologize or put your needs aside, that will only continue as the relationship goes on.
Even if they don't have the best resolution skills, they'll at least work on improving them Speaking of scuffles, a great of a solid match for you is a fighting style that doesn't make mountains out mole hills. The easier you're able to work through conflicts or differences together, the better, but for some couples, that takes time.
You could fall for a person who is all about you all the time—that is, until, you try to integrate them into other areas of your life. The One will take a true interest in your family and friends, your childhood, your career, and your interests—the things that take up your everyday—because, simply put, they want to be part of your everyday. Similarly, you will want to learn as much as you can about who they are outside of your relationship. Life is not easy. I don't need to tell you that. A lot of people men especially build and keep emotional walls that prevent them being vulnerable.
But if you both can't be vulnerable with each other, you're missing out on a deeper connection. I believe that people evolve and their goals and visions for their future sometimes change, which can cause some couples to grow apart. But when you're with The One, you're able to picture the day-to-day in pretty similar terms.
That's not the same as compromising: Compromising on big life desires like having children, for example for someone else often ends up being more of a sacrifice, which can lead to resentment. Above all, know that The One will give as much as they take.
Relationships aren't one-hundred percent equal, one-hundred percent of time. But when you find The One, you'll know. And not because you get some magical feeling I don't entirely subscribe to that ideabut because they'll make an equal effort to understand your fears, your love languages, your needs And they won't stop at anything short of making sure you know that you're their One, too.
Weight Loss. United States. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. The Healthy Cooking Awards. Yulia Reznikov Getty Images. Ah, "The One. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.
More from Dr. This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this to help users provide their addresses. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano. Advertisement - Continue Reading Below. More From Relationships. Ask Dr.Looking for that real one
email: [email protected] - phone:(929) 959-2063 x 6917
Odd request I'm looking for the 'shit just got real' song.